Thursday, June 7, 2012

My Boyfriend is a Monster: My Boyfriend Bites by Dan Jolley and Alitha E. Martinez

Vanessa Shingle just likes to make people the best that they can be, kind of like the army except without the training or the ability to better people's lives. So what if her last three boyfriends/projects all ended up worse off than before? If they'd listened to her they wouldn't have ended up in jail/military school/unemployed. Which brings us to her latest fixer-upper: Jean-Paul. He's gorgeous, a literal life-saver, and turns into a bat. As things get more freaky, Vanessa learns that she has a destiny to fulfill and that the scariest things in life are not a bad first date.

This is the third book in the My Boyfriend is a Monster series. Each is a standalone book that depicts a different monster: Frankenstein, zombie, ghosts, etc. Ari read the first one I Love Him to Pieces and enjoyed it. I found this to be really intolerable.

I'm going to guess that Vanessa is supposed to have somewhat of a victim mentality at the beginning of the book and then grows into this warrior woman. I thought that she was just lame. As in needs to work on herself before she works on anyone else because she has MAJOR issues, I mean who really goes out of their way to date losers? What happens if the loser boys had improved themselves? Does she then continue to date them or then dump them so that she can go 'help' someone else? Also Jean-Paul really needs to work on keeping his were-bat-hood secret a secret. And his pseudo-relationship with Vanessa completely weirded me out. It developed strangely fast and yet they didn't really spend all that much time together.

It didn't help that the artwork was not my favorite. Jean-Paul kind of reminds me of the lead singer from Metalocalypse and Vanessa's lips are distractingly puffy. They are bigger than Angelina Jolie's. Weird. But what really sank this for me was the it was a strange amalgamation of Buffy tropes and Twilight characters. Except not as well done, which is pretty sad because let's be honest Twilight is not Stoker's Dracula.

So two very different reactions to this series. I will not be reading anymore of this series, because I thought it was awful.

3 comments:

  1. Your review, had me laughing out loud :D I guess the artist of this graphic novel is not that great then!

    Oh my, this is the funniest review I've read in a terribly long time!

    I'll definitely be staying tuned! :)

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    Replies
    1. Glad that you enjoyed the review, even if it was about a truly terrible book. Though if I'm honest about it, the fun reviews are usually about the terrible books!

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  2. The first My Boyfriend's a Monster was awesome!

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